How Weaponized Incompetence Drives Women To Take on More Household Chores


  Back in the day, I fell for this hard!  Weaponized incompetence is sometimes called "strategic incompetence."  This is a term us...

Back in the day, I fell for this hard! 

Weaponized incompetence is sometimes called "strategic incompetence."  This is a term used in popular psychology to explain feigned incompetence to perform a task where the mission is to get someone else to do the task.

This strategy works. Especially when you are in love with someone. I once had a boyfriend who pretended to be unable to perform a whole lot of household chores around the house.  Practically all of them.

As I write this, I can't think of a single household chore that he performed regularly.  Still, I allowed others to blame me and me alone when the house was messy.  Like he did not live there too. 

Washing dishes was a big one. He was awful at it. I even felt proud that I was better at doing dishes than he was. I joked about it. He joked about it. We joked about it together in public.   

All of this would have stayed funny if the relationship weren't so unbalanced.  

It might have kept being funny if only I hadn't realized that letting him play me for stupid was really causing me to lean into it.  

On my end, I was ignoring my strengths and intelligence to make it all work. To accept that mess, sometimes you find yourself fooling yourself in other areas too. 
I had to play a fool to make it all work ....until I couldn't do it any longer. 

Reading the brief stories in the articles below reminded me of a time when I was less honest with myself. The women sharing their stories are aware of what's going on. Back then, I would not allow myself to go to that level of awareness.  I was afraid of what that might mean. 



.abuse,5,Abuse,84,abuse healing,2,Abuse by Older,6,Abuse by Older Children,41,Advocates/Activists,86,affirmation,14,Affirmations,84,Art,28,Audio,36,Black femicide,20,Black Women,71,body movement,8,Body safety,67,Books,31,Boundaries,56,Boys of Color,38,Buy Now,9,Campus sexual violence,23,Caught In the Hive,2,Celebrity/Fame,36,child safety,94,Child sexual abuse,109,Child sexual violence,109,Children,76,Civil Rights,10,Civil Rights/Social Justice,87,Coercion,17,Consent,29,Disabilities,23,Doing Better,102,Domestic Violence,64,ebook,10,Encourage,39,Faith,65,Faith in Storms,63,Female Health,88,female health civil rights,76,Female Safety,127,Femicide,27,Feminism/Womanism,183,Forgiveness,11,FREE,2,FREEBIE,8,Girls of Color,79,Global Conflict,3,Guest Post,2,Happy Holidays,3,Healing,171,healing art heals,2,Health,35,High Five from WESurvive,7,History/Herstory,115,Human Trafficking,17,Immigration,9,In the News,131,Infographic,6,Journaling,13,Leave the Kids Alone,16,LGBT,45,Male Survivors,26,Men of Color,20,Mental health,55,Mental Wellnes and Health,18,Mental Wellness and Health,77,Mood Board,4,Newsletter,3,Online Abuse/Predators,3,or Genocide,1,Parenting Tips & Awareness,16,People with disabilities,52,podcast,9,Political Action Alerts,55,Prevention,16,Public Speaking,19,Public Speaking,9,Quotes,20,Rape,89,Relationships,68,Resources,37,Resources for parents/caretakers,33,Resources for victims/Survivors,39,Safe Spaces,47,safegaurding,5,Safeguarding,73,Safety,31,Self care,81,Self Love,49,Self Love videos,11,Shop,7,Sibling Abuse,10,SPEAK,87,Statistics,3,Storytelling,29,Substance Use,4,Suicide,20,Surviving Daily,491,Teens,3,Testimonial Tuesday,4,video,96,videos,12,War,2,wineb,1,Wisdom,142,women,74,Women of Color,174,
WE Survive Abuse : How Weaponized Incompetence Drives Women To Take on More Household Chores
How Weaponized Incompetence Drives Women To Take on More Household Chores
WE Survive Abuse
Loaded All Posts Not found any posts VIEW ALL Readmore Reply Cancel reply Delete By Home PAGES POSTS View All RECOMMENDED FOR YOU LABEL ARCHIVE SEARCH ALL POSTS Not found any post match with your request Back Home Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat January February March April May June July August September October November December Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec just now 1 minute ago $$1$$ minutes ago 1 hour ago $$1$$ hours ago Yesterday $$1$$ days ago $$1$$ weeks ago more than 5 weeks ago Followers Follow THIS PREMIUM CONTENT IS LOCKED STEP 1: Share to a social network STEP 2: Click the link on your social network Copy All Code Select All Code All codes were copied to your clipboard Can not copy the codes / texts, please press [CTRL]+[C] (or CMD+C with Mac) to copy Table of Content