Woman, You Are Enough

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“The process begins with the individual woman’s acceptance that American women, 
without exception, are socialized to be racist, classist and sexist, 
in varying degrees, and that labeling ourselves feminists does 
not change the fact that we must consciously work 
to rid ourselves of the legacy of negative socialization.”

― bell hooks, Ain't I a Woman: Black Women and Feminism

 

Woman, You are Enough

Being a woman means constantly being told;

“you aren’t doing enough”

“you aren’t skinny enough”…. “you aren’t curvy enough”….. “you aren’t tall enough” ….”you aren’t light enough”….. “you aren’t dark enough”….. “you aren’t sexy enough”….. “you aren’t cute enough” ….”you aren’t pretty enough”

‘”you aren’t smart enough”….you aren’t mature enough”…..you aren’t young enough”

“you aren’t strong enough”…..”you aren’t loud enough”….”you aren’t quiet enough”


“No black woman writer in this culture can write "too much". 
Indeed, no woman writer can write "too much"...No woman has ever written enough.”
― bell hooks, remembered rapture: the writer at work

 

I am thankful that I had wise women to counsel me to just ignore those folks who dare to announce to me, that, I am not enough.  

“For some people, not even “everything” is enough.”

“For some people, even God’s best isn’t “enough”

I am ME. I am enough.

“Woman work a great many miracles.”- Louisa May Alcott

Woman, What You Do is Enough

You see, it’s a historic election season in the US. 

THE Notorious RBG (Ruth Bader Ginsburg) has transitioned.

Everything is in flux. You know how it is. We come here every time a matriarch that was holding everything together passes away. It happens when the mother of communities, families, & churches pass on.

This time is different though. This time it’s everyone in an entire country going through it at once.

There will be anger. There will be animosity. There will be fear. There will be anxiety.

There will be blaming. There will be shaming.

And woe if you are a woman, somehow, some kind of way, most of it will get all over you. Your body.

A word of caution to my fellow advocates and activists. Most women, always care about XYZ #socialjustice issue but spare chunks of time is a luxury for women that grows less affordable with every passing day. 

As the discourse levels up, may we all approach women in this society with grace and respect. The issues we are about to analyze and discuss have a special place in the lives of women. It’s a sensitive space. 

Just because a woman doesn’t speak publically about these hard topics…  You may not have ever seen a woman meet with others about these issues.

Never heard her address these issues in public.

Never seen her mention these issues on social media.

Still, remind yourself that these are issues that directly impact and intersect with the lives of women, and the lives of people that they care deeply for.

Believe me, women are experts at multitasking which happens to include the skill of shifting priorities as needed.  Good thing because it is women who tend to be in charge of caretaking for children, men, relatives, friends, & neighbors.

We have to remember that shifting priorities isn’t an indication that women “don’t care.”

We women can do a lot of things but we don’t have the ability to care about everything at once.

Woman, What You Do is Enough

I once heard Oprah say; “Women can have it all we just can’t have it all at one time.”  At the time she was acknowledging that had she had children, she would never be able to put the level of energy into her career the way that she does.

We may all have the same 24hours but we sure don’t all have the same amount of resources, energy, and time for ourselves.  Women tend to be the caretakers of everyone.

Now, if we can’t have it all at once for OURSELVES, don’t expect us to spread our energy across everything wrong with this world at once.

Human beings are only here for a little while.

Women come into this world with a treasure chest of beautiful things, but unlimited energy isn’t one of them.
And, don’t be surprised to find that as a woman is blessed with getting older, we somehow acquire more to “take care of”.

“Throw a punch, for the children”- Nancy Pelosi

 

Woman, Your Best is Good Enough

May we not shame women for managing their energy in a way that supports wellness and balance for them as an individual.

May we not shame women for managing their energy in a way that supports wellness and balance for their families, friends, loved ones, and all who depend on them.

May we not shame women for managing their energy in a way that supports wellness and balance for the work that they do.

May we not shame women for managing their energy in a way that supports wellness and balance for the causes that they care about.

May we not shame women for managing their energy in a way that supports wellness and balance for their financial well-being.

And, between all of this, women require sleep and rest.

“Almost everyone first realized they were becoming a grown woman 
when some dude did something nasty to them. 
...It was mostly men yelling shit from cars. 
Are they a patrol sent out to let girls know they've crossed into puberty? 
If so, it's working.”

― Tina Fey, Bossypants

 

Woman, Who You Are is Enough

So as we dive into this important issue of women’s reproductive rights, civil rights, voting rights, and more…..It isn’t a good move to attempt to “shame” women for putting their energies into other aspects of life that required their attention.

Even with all this technology being developed every month, women still don’t even have the luxury of prioritizing our own needs ever.

Ease Up. Forgive women for not saving the whole world from itself sometimes.

If they keep failing to understand your plight, tell them: “It’s a woman thing. I don’t even have time to explain it to you.”

There’s going to be conflict, tension, and discourse. It’s going to be a rough ride for a bit. But, we got this.

We’re acquainted with this road.  Women’s work (that which sustains life as we know it) is/always has been accomplished by coming to compromise & consensus.

You have more than enough to successfully navigate this journey.

Woman, you are enough.

“She was powerful,
not because she wasn't scared
but because she went on so strongly,
despite the fear.”

― Atticus 

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