The space between our legs is not your designated safe space. -Tonya GJ Prince
I HATE. I ABHOR. I DESPISE oppression.
I may fight for you and your rights, money, safety, or justice if I can.
BUT, No one is owed justice, equity, equality nor reparations by way of romantic attention or sex from girls/women.
As an advocate, you hear a lot of people’s stories. You learn that a lot of sexual abuse and rape cases begin with coercion. Often, it is some sort of “if/then” scenario. Commonly, “if you don’t allow me access to you/your time, then something undesirable will happen.”
Boys/men, girls/women, grow up holding feelings of great shame, guilt, self-hate because they “fell for” these tricks. They believe that they wouldn’t be suffering from so much pain from rape and abuse now if only they “were smarter.” “If only they had said no”
This is not true. If you were someone who was victimized through trickery, manipulation and lies …..IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT.
People who use these vicious attacks are not seen by the masses as someone who’s as monstrous as say the person who rapes using physical violent. Not as deceptive as the guy with the mask and gloves on.
That’s not true either. These people (young and old) selfishly get the same result using cunning tactics that can leave a lifetime scar.
Please remember, tell all the young people you know, how wrong this type of behavior is. It’s dangerous, harmful, painful, and violent. Unfortunately, the internet makes has made it easier to reach people who are vulnerable to these tactics. (Note: vulnerable doesn’t mean “not smart or savvy”)
More and more, in previously undiscussed areas of life, we see people setting up scenarios for these “if/then” rules that involve access to girls/women. Well, would you look at that?
There’s this idea that entire groups of girls/women MUST, with very few excusable exceptions, date or be willing to have sex with certain men or they will be considered bigots.
In this season of focus on civil rights, justice, and “wokeness”; this matters a lot to people. The focus on civil rights is necessary and overdue by several generations. The same goes for the focus on justice for oppressed groups.
To be completely clear:
This predatory behavior is primarily being campaigned by males, BUT too many women are supporting and enforcing it. Stop it. It is creepy and violent.
Go find your love without using manipulation and creepery. Be attractive to good people.
Examples of coercion:
“Kiss me or I will tell everyone that you did anyway”
“Kiss me or my feelings will be hurt.”
“Let me____, or I will get my sister to beat you up.”
“Do this or I will tell your mom about that thing you did.”
“Do this or I will tell your mom you cursed.”
“Do this or I will spread rumors about you.”
“Do this or I will lie to (insert name) and tell her that you were talking about her.”
“Send me a nude picture of you or I will….”
“Let me____, or you won’t be my favorite anymore”
“Date/have sex with me or you will be considered biphobic”
“Date/have sex with me or you will be considered transphobic”
“Date/have sex with me or you will be considered racist.”
“Date/have sex with me or you are homophobic.”
*****Let us remember…people can date you and/or have sex with you and still kill you because they believe you don’t even have the ‘right’ to reject them because you are ‘inferior’ to them. Dating and sexing is not a guarantee against prejudice, bigotry, bias, nor hate.
If you’re a fan of NCIS, the episode “Caged” did an excellent job of highlighting sexual coercion. In it, a prison guard was able to coerce an inmate into allowing her young daughter to be raped by him.
I could go on and on. Google: tricked into sending nudes and the results are heartbreaking.
Repeating until the end of time…………..
No one is owed justice, equity, equality nor reparations by way of romantic attention or sex from girls/women.
Stop playing in our beautiful faces.
The space between our legs is not your designated safe space.
From @TonyaGJPrince on Twitter
The boundary lines that you surrender in favor of being ‘accommodating’ are not always easily recoverable. #ProtectYou