What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. ~William Shakespeare Remix (Originally posted on WESurviveAbuse.com) 12/17/2015 Well, this week I learned that the Millennials outnumbered the Baby Boomers. The first time that any generation has outnumbered the Baby Boomers. Perhaps that is why there has partly contributed to the recent attention to social change and social justice. I realize that
Sexual violence at the hands of children is just as destructive as any violation by an adult. It is hard being the victim of an older child. In the back of our collective mind, our society still thinks that it is less harmless to be violated by a child than by an adult. I spoke to a woman who came to talk to meet with me wearing a restaurant uniform.
Glad to see that we are in a season of listening to the powerful voices of Survivors. Excellent! What is most unfortunate is that there are so many out there. This week I gathered up a cross section of a few memoirs that I have read about the healing journey. Each one is truly authentic. I don’t think that any two are the same. While it isn’t “good” that they
My Granny had a saying, “You have got to reach up and git yo self, now.” She always said it with such a stern voice. I think because of that I missed the love that was within her message. She would say this to you if you were outwardly distressed, angry, anxious, or having some sort of breakdown. In fact, it was a common phrase said amongst older black southerners.
Fannie Lou Hamer! Dr. Martin Luther King Jr! Rosa Parks! Angela Davis! Dr. Maya Angelou! Nina Simone! Malcolm X! Names you’ve heard. Just judging by who is mentioned during Black History Month, it might seem that, in order to make history one must make a name for oneself. That is how you make history. Right? Well my fellow Survivors I submit to you that though it may seem
“I learned how to stand up for myself from the civil rights movement. We learned from you.” Original post appeared 7/22/15 (updated) Tonya, did you know? Those were the words spoken to me by the then reigning Ms. Wheelchair VA many, many years ago. She and I had just presented a workshop together. I must tell you, though due to her disability, she doesn’t speak clearly. I
Domestic and Sexual Violence are tough issues to discuss. BUT, thankfully, speakers have quite a few options for approaching the topic. In this blog post, I just list four. Trust me, there are so many styles and tools at a speaker’s disposal. You are only limited by the ceiling of your creativity, and your courage. Alright y’all, here are the four……. Storytelling/Dramatic: Since the beginning of time elders,
Let Me Tell It I once worked as the sexual assault Outreach Advocate for the state of Virginia. Here is what I learned. What one thing that I learned is that no human being can tell everyone’s story. It is just impossible. It is why I like to build platforms to give others an opportunity to tell their own. I like to empower others to lift their voices. And, I like
You might have heard of a concept called “group think”. Short version: It means when everyone goes along in the same direction because that is what they are used to. They almost do it habitually. Like a routine They forgot ‘why’ a long time ago. In fact, the ‘why’ doesn’t even matter to them anymore. Nevertheless, they will defend it to the death. Example: In my early years of marriage,
One of my best writing teachers taught me a great lesson. Read, read, read. Write, write, write. The best way to learn to write is to study the story telling skills of others. Like building a house. Now, we take our materials and build on top of that. How about we come up with some great books that help. But will anyone listen? I’ll admit. It is
Now, in order to tell your story you are going to need the details of your stories. No one can tell your story like you can. Survivors have some of the most fascinating stories ever. Why? 1.Stories of good vs. evil are of great interest to people from the time that they are small children. Good vs. evil is the core of most fairy tales. Sexual/domestic abuse is truly
SilenceYou have the right to remain silent. I learned about the Miranda rights case in my 8th grade Civics class.Great lesson. Remaining silent can actually keep you out of prison. Got it.That was pretty easy. That went right along with the family’s commandment. “Don’t put all your business in the street.” SpeakingBut who teaches when to speak? Who teaches us how to speak? Specifically, who teaches us how to talk about rape or sexual abuse?There are no classes for
In early 2002 or so a group of us Women of Color working in sexual and domestic drove down from Virginia to North Carolina to a two-day conference. It was a Women of Color conference. There weren’t many being held in the southern region. So at that time, nearby states drove to support one another just in case other people had “other things to do”. (Still that way in too