Special Online Resources for Parents/Caretakers

Safety Resources   (Printable Download of these resources at the bottom of the page) Sex Offender Registry     Parents for Megans Law and the Crime Victims Center www.parentsformeganslaw.org In July 1994 the world lost 7-year-old Megan Nicole Kanka.  She was sexually assaulted and killed by her neighbor who was a previously convicted sex offender.  […]

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Exposes The Danger of the Single Story

What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. ~William Shakespeare Remix (Originally posted on WESurviveAbuse.com) 12/17/2015 Well, this week I learned that the Millennials outnumbered the Baby Boomers.  The first time that any generation has outnumbered the Baby Boomers. Perhaps that is why there has […]

Child against Child Abuse: The Most Overlooked Facts About Child Sexual Abuse Exposed by Experts

Sexual violence at the hands of children is just as destructive as any violation by an adult. It is hard being the victim of an older child.  In the back of our collective mind, our society still thinks that it is less harmless to be violated by a child than by an adult. I spoke […]

10 Excellent Memoirs about the Sexual Violence Survivor’s Journey

Glad to see that we are in a season of listening to the powerful voices of Survivors.  Excellent!  What is most unfortunate is that there are so many out there.  This week I gathered up a cross section of a few memoirs that I have read about the healing journey.  Each one is truly authentic. […]

How the Hopeless Find Hope Again

My Granny had a saying, “You have got to reach up and git yo self, now.”  She always said it with such a stern voice.  I think because of that I missed the love that was within her message.  She would say this to you if you were outwardly distressed, angry, anxious, or having some […]

How Survivors of Sexual & Domestic Violence Can Make History

Fannie Lou Hamer! Dr. Martin Luther King Jr! Rosa Parks! Angela Davis! Dr. Maya Angelou! Nina Simone! Malcolm X! Names you’ve heard.    Just judging by who is mentioned during Black History Month, it might seem that, in order to make history one must make a name for oneself.    That is how you make […]

Silent Lies: Why Black Women Must Continue to Lead the Resistance

Silent Lies: Why Black Women Must Continue to Lead the Resistance

“I learned how to stand up for myself from the civil rights movement. We learned from you.”   Original post appeared 7/22/15 (updated) Tonya, did you know?   Those were the words spoken to me by the then reigning Ms. Wheelchair VA many, many years ago.    She and I had just presented a workshop together.  […]

From All Angles: 4 Ways Survivor Speakers Can Help Folks Heal, Know, & Grow

From All Angles: 4 Ways Survivor Speakers Can Help Folks Heal, Know, & Grow

Domestic and Sexual Violence are tough issues to discuss.  BUT, thankfully, speakers have quite a few options for approaching the topic.  In this blog post, I just list four.   Trust me, there are so many styles and tools at a speaker’s disposal.  You are only limited by the ceiling of your creativity, and your courage.  […]

How to Get the Truth Around Obstacles of Myths, Lies, & Distraction: Infographics

Let Me Tell It I once worked as the sexual assault Outreach Advocate for the state of Virginia.  Here is what I learned.  What one thing that I learned is that no human being can tell everyone’s story. It is just impossible. It is why I like to build platforms to give others an opportunity to […]

How to Break Through Group Think and Get Your Message Delivered

You might have heard of a concept called “group think”.   Short version: It means when everyone goes along in the same direction because that is what they are used to.  They almost do it habitually.  Like a routine They forgot ‘why’ a long time ago.  In fact, the ‘why’ doesn’t even matter to them anymore.  […]

Tonya’s Top Picks for Best Sexual & Domestic Violence Storytelling for Survivors

One of my best writing teachers taught me a great lesson.   Read, read, read.  Write, write, write. The best way to learn to write is to study the story telling skills of others.   Like building a house.  Now, we take our materials and build on top of that.  How about we come up […]

How Survivors Can Preserve the Lessons from Their Experiences for Storytelling

In order to tell your story, you are going to need the details. No one can tell your story like you can. And Survivors have some of the most fascinating stories ever. Why?   1.Stories of good vs. evil are of great interest to people from the time that they are small children. Good vs. […]

Survivors Have the Right to Tell Their Stories

Silence You have the right to remain silent. I learned about the Miranda rights case in my 8th grade Civics class. Great lesson. Remaining silent can actually keep you out of prison. Got it. That was pretty easy. That went right along with the family’s commandment. “Don’t put all your business in the street.”   Speaking But who […]

High Five From WESurvive: Lavon Morris Grant A Spiritual Miracle

In early 2002 or so a group of us Women of Color working in sexual and domestic drove down from Virginia to North Carolina to a two-day conference.  It was a Women of Color conference.   There weren’t many being held in the southern region.  So at that time, nearby states drove to support one another […]

How Anger Helps Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse

Imagine it is your 18th birthday.   A well dressed stranger comes to your home. He has news for you. He tells you that you have inherited $550 million dollars payable upon your 18th birthday.   Hey! That is today. You jump up and down.  Cry, get excited.  Dance.  Think of everything that you will buy. Think of […]

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